“A woman of Samaria came to draw water. Jesus said to her, “Give Me a drink”.” John 4:7 (NKJV)
Dear Sister,
Closeness with God is often spoken about as something we should move toward easily. Something that should feel natural or immediate.
But Scripture tells a more patient story.
In John 4, Jesus meets a woman whose life had been shaped by complexity, history, and survival. He does not begin with correction. He does not begin with demand. He begins with presence.
As I continue walking my own healing journey, this story matters to me deeply because my life mirrors hers in modern terms. Not in every detail or circumstance, but in the experience of carrying a complicated story and encountering Jesus in the middle of ordinary life.
Like her, I am still walking.
And like her, I am still being met.
Jesus Goes Where She Is
The woman at the well does not go looking for Jesus.
Jesus goes looking for her.
He meets her in the middle of an ordinary task, at a well she had likely visited many times before.
“Now Jacob’s well was there. Jesus therefore, being wearied from His journey, sat thus by the well. It was about the sixth hour.” John 4:6 (NKJV)
Before there is conversation, there is presence.
Jesus positions Himself where she already is. He does not ask her to move closer first. He comes near before anything is asked of her.
That has been true in my life as well. Jesus has met me, and continues to meet me, in ordinary places, in routines that had been shaped by survival rather than spiritual readiness. He did not wait for me to know how to draw close. He came near first.
Closeness Begins with Safety
Jesus does not overwhelm her with truth.
He does not expose her publicly.
He does not demand intimacy.
He speaks plainly.
He listens.
He stays.
When the conversation turns toward her life, Jesus does not rush it. He names what is real, not to control her story, but to be present within it.
“for you have had five husbands, and the one whom you now have is not your husband; in that you spoke truly.” John 4:18 (NKJV)
What stands out to me is that truth does not change His posture. Jesus does not step back when her story is revealed. His presence does not lessen when things become complicated.
Safety was already established.
When love feels calm and steady, the heart does not have to flee. God designed us this way. Presence that is patient makes room for honesty without fear.
Jesus Does Not Demand Closeness
Jesus offers living water, but He does not force her to drink.
He speaks of worship, not as a rule to follow, but as a relationship to enter.
“But the hour is coming, and now is, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth; for the Father is seeking such to worship Him.” John 4:23 (NKJV)
As I walk in my own healing journey, I have come to recognize this same gentleness. Jesus does not demand understanding before relationship. He allows growth to happen over time.
And when things became more complicated, He did not step away.
He came closer.
Closeness, in my experience, did not come through striving. It returned as I learned that God was not in a hurry with me, and that His presence did not lessen as my story unfolded, because He already knew my story.
Being Known Without Being Pushed Away
One of the most powerful parts of this story is not what Jesus says, but what He does not do.
He does not leave when her story is revealed. He knew her story.
He does not withdraw when things become complicated. He knew her complications.
He does not shorten the conversation. He prolongs it.
He remains.
That has shaped how I understand God’s love. Remaining presence teaches the heart something quietly. And when someone stays, and even draws nearer, we do not have to brace for abandonment.
This is how Jesus has meets us as well.
Steady. Present. Unthreatened by our story.
My Moment of Reflection
As someone who is still on this journey, I see myself in the woman at the well because my life mirrors hers in meaningful ways. We both encountered Jesus not at our best moments, but in the middle of ordinary, complicated lives.
Learning closeness with God has looked like learning to trust Jesus, who meets, stays, and comes closer, even when the story is not so simple.
A Gentle Pause
If closeness with God feels different than it once did, I understand.
Jesus still meets us where we are.
He still sits with us.
He still speaks gently.
“The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, And saves such as [a]have a contrite spirit.”
Psalm 34:18 (NKJV)
Closeness with God grows where safety lives.
And God is not in a hurry.
With love and truth,
Jane Coy
Still on the Journey Ministries
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